Wellness Wednesday – “Leading With A Limp”
For this Wellness Wednesday, I would like to share some reflections from an invaluable book I read during my doctoral studies that I pray will be a blessing for you in your ministry today, “Leading With A Limp” by Dan Allender. The central theme of Allender’s book is that our true strength for ministry emerges from our weaknesses, creating an environment that fosters authentic leadership development. This idea, while simple, can transform the way we view our roles as ministry leaders.
One of the most encouraging insights from the book is the liberation that comes from not needing to hide our weaknesses. Allender identifies three primary reasons why leaders tend to conceal their failures: fear, narcissism, and addiction. If we can be honest about who we are and our need for a Savior, this truth will set us free to lead more effectively and build greater trust with those around us. Allender beautifully states, “Every one of your weaknesses is the doorway not only to better character but to leadership dividends so enormous that avoiding the necessary risk is utter foolishness.” Through our brokenness, God meets us with His grace, freeing us from ourselves and making us better leaders.
The Apostle Paul reflects on this power for ministry when we embrace our struggles and weaknesses when he writes in 2 Corinthians 12:9-11, “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Allender uses the biblical example of Jacob wrestling with God to illustrate how we can lead with a limp. After Jacob’s encounter, he was both broken and renamed, signifying a new identity shaped by God. Allender explains, “He wrestles with God and comes away broken and renamed. His limp is a reminder that when God renames us, he also makes each one of us a new person through a redemption that requires brokenness.” This resonates deeply with me. I experienced a significant moment of being remade by God after stepping away for a season of healing my first pastoral ministry. What I initially saw as a mistake became a transformative wilderness experience where Jesus taught me true dependence on Him for my identity. During this time, I also discovered the value of coaching as a way to empower others to discover and live out their unique calling in Christ. God redeemed my mistake, making me more useful for His purpose, less full of myself, and more filled with Him.
Another crucial takeaway from Allender’s book is the emphasis on the importance of ethics and character in leadership development. Many seminaries, including the one I attended, focus heavily on content and skills, with only a small portion dedicated to character and ethics of pastoral ministry. This imbalance can lead to significant struggles for pastors, as issues of character and ethics often do not resolve themselves through theory and skill alone. From my many years of ministry experience, coaching and character formation should be prioritized in leadership development at seminaries. Talent without character is like whipped cream—it tastes good until a crisis reveals its lack of substance to withstand the difficult challenges we all face in ministry.
As I reflect on the implications of this book for my own ministry, several questions arise. One is the loneliness that often accompanies pastoral leadership. Allender poignantly describes this reality: “Leadership loneliness is far more than a state of being alone. The fact that we are set apart for a task and a calling is what deprives us of the normal fare of family and friendship.” Aside from my wife and son, there have been many years in ministry where I haven’t had close friends despite having great relationships within my congregation. I struggled to honestly share this aspect of my life with my congregation, and I especially struggled with finding the friends I desperately needed.
Another question from this book that is important for everyone in ministry to take seriously is how to model being my congregation’s “chief sinner,” as Allender suggests. We are all, like the Apostle Paul, the worst of sinners. I would often tell my congregations that I am not their pastor because of some special quality within me but because I know Jesus’ love and forgiveness in a powerful way and want to share that with others. For some, this is a stumbling block; for others, it is a source of comfort and encouragement. What specific aspects of my “limp” should I reveal to demonstrate true dependence on God’s grace in Christ?
The book Leading With A Limp’s value for my pastoral ministry is clear: By being honest about our struggles and our need for Jesus’ grace, we can die to our pride, allowing Jesus to shine through more brightly. This honesty makes us better servant leaders, not using our ministry to feed our pride but to glorify Jesus and encourage those we serve to live out their faith amid their struggles.
So today, let us embrace our weaknesses as ministry leaders, lead with our limps, and create spaces where authenticity and grace abound.
