written by Rev. Alan Shaw

I took this picture knowing I’d write about it but wasn’t sure what the topic would be so I asked someone what words came to mind when they looked at it.  I did not expect their reply, “Sometimes the brokenness in your life doesn’t completely go away”.

I was walking on the beach and listening to the seagulls and ocean waves.  The weather was perfect.  It was peaceful and relaxing.  I was not prepared to swap that feeling with thoughts of brokenness, but now I saw the pier from another perspective.

I’ve felt the pain of storms in my life, and I’ve listened to others share their experiences.  Being an optimist, I find it easy to encourage people to know the storm will shift and the sun will return.  I think this optimistic approach is what made me glance over the fact that the pier still needed major repair.  Maybe one day it will be repaired; maybe it will still bear the scars of the storm.  As we look at our wellness this month, I want to acknowledge that sometimes the scars of past experiences don’t go away even after the storm has long passed.

I can only share my experiences and perspective, but here’s what I hope you take away from this picture:

1. A storm will come. No one is exempt from what life hands us and sometimes it gets pretty dark, windy, and destructive. Maybe it’s a “hurricane” that gives us time to prepare.  Maybe it’s a “flash flood” that hits faster and stronger that we anticipated.  There are things we can do to prepare, but the point isn’t so much the preparation as it is understanding a storm will eventually come.
2. The storm isn’t fair. Ever see pictures of storms that decimate one house but barely affect the neighboring house?  Not everyone knows when you’re in a storm.  This is where communication and empathy are important.  I can’t expect others to recognize my storm.  Similarly, I can’t assume how my neighbor will fare in their storm.  It’s important to let others know when we need help, and to be there when our neighbor calls.
3. The storm will pass. Insert “optimistic voice” here: “You will make it through this”.  I’m still optimistic, but now I have a greater appreciation for the scars we carry when the storm is done, but the feeling of brokenness remains.
4. Some will never see the damage. I think this is a new revelation for me.  The damage to the pier was right in front of me but I never saw it.  Some people will NEVER share their storm damage.  Some will share with us, but we won’t see the damage.  Some WILL share and let us help them rebuild.

Rev Alan Shaw is an Assistant Pastor at Resurrection Lutheran Church in Cary, NC. He is a retired Army officer and serves as a resource for the SED and LCMS with Christian Conciliation training, workshops, and reconciliation cases. He can be reached at alan@restoringharmonyllc.com.